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Can’t Believe I’m Here! Top 10 Lessons Learned 50 Episodes into this Ex-Mormon Christian Show.

March 29, 2022

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Today is the show’s 50th episode. I can’t believe it! This has been such an exciting journey.

Let me just take you all back a minute.

2020 rocked most of our lives. It was a wild ride. For me, it meant a faith transformation like I had never thought possible. Somewhere in the mix of all the trying to figure out how to keep going I listened to a podcast where there was a guest named Stef Gass. She was a podcast coach, but she did something totally different than all the other self-help and business coaches were saying. She talked about making God in charge of your life and business and living your God-led calling.

I knew God needed to be the center of my life. I had already told Him whatever He wanted me to do I would do.

Little did I know that He was about to tell me that my calling was going to be to talk to and help ladies that had left the church I had been avoiding for the last 20 years.

Sometimes He can have a sense of humor, but when God speaks, I learned it is best to listen.


Top Resources to help you Rock The Christian Life as an Exmo

Hearing from God is just one area that you may be struggling with now after leaving the church, but you are not alone on this journey. I compiled all of my favorite apps, videos, books, music all sorts of things that have helped me on this journey and put them into a resource library for you. Click below for access to it all. So fun!

 
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You’re re-learning it all. Why not get some direction on your way?!? This takes you to my full library of things I have found so dang helpful on my faith journey. I know they will help you too! 
 
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Thank you!

Top 10 Lessons Learned 50 Episodes into this Ex-Mormon Christian Show

1. How to get over fear.

I had no idea how scared I still was to say something against the church. That socialization runs deep. Nothing I have ever said or most likely ever will say is mean against the people of the church, not even really the church itself. There are plenty of other people to do that. I’ll talk about that later. Everything I talk about here is about learning what it means to become a Christian after leaving the church and it is hard. Nonetheless, I was very scared to use the term Mormon, LDS, Ex- anything, I was even scared to say the church. If you look back you will notice I said none of those things until very recently because. I did not want to be lumped into anti-Mormon literature. Just to be clear, I love Mormon people. I don’t talk bad about the church. What I do talk about is what is biblical and what is different than what we were taught. I didn’t realize how scary that would be.

2. How many people leave God when they leave the church.

I’m told it’s about 85%. I would guess that the number who have a Godless time after leaving is more like 98%. I always thought my journey was sooo unique. The journey of leaving God because when you leave all you ever knew about God your brain kind of explodes. Dabbling into other religions- Lutheran, catholic, baptist- trying to find the answer to what am I now. Going new-age- Eckart Tole and a New Earth with Oprah. Buddhism and all that Jazz. I thought me knowing who God was according to my beliefs and standards was unique to me. Literally, God forbid I turn one man-made religion in for another like Christianity. I’ll listen to the mega-churches every once in a while, but it’s just a pep talk. 🤷‍♀️🙈

How silly I was.

This is just par for the course when we leave Mormonism.

I didn’t realize most people leave God and most people, like I was are really angry. At God, at the church, just a lot of emotions. And it’s all pretty normal.

3. Do All Mormons distrust the Bible?

When I thought about how to start talking to you all about God, I knew God Himself was going to have to do a large part of the talking. I was going to have to talk from the Bible. The thing that surprised me, was like myself, most of you were taught to not trust it and that lesson ran deep. Even though we all left Mormonism we took so many things with us. We rejected the teachings but still believed the parts that hurt us the most. It surprised me what a hurdle this has been. For myself included. I had never read the whole Bible cover to cover before. Just bits and pieces.

Let’s just dispel this leftover, bad teaching lie right now- The Bible is God-Breathed and Living Water to our Soul. Grab the link to the resource library if you want to learn more.

4. Learning more about what Mormons believe out than I ever did in.

Well, in order to talk about all this I had to reacquaint myself with a religion I had left over 20 years ago. I have learned a lot. Mind you, the internet did not exist when I left. I have read books, watched videos, talked to you all. Talked a lot. What i don’t think never been Mormons realize is nobody gives you all the doctrine in one shot. It’s on a slow drip so you don’t really know when you’re in it. What has been shocking to me is how deep those lessons ran. Things I didn’t even know were unique to the religion i carried with me well past agnosticism, new age, Buddhism, even after coming to Christ. Reading what Mormons believe and learning how this was unique helped me to discern what is not.

A big one. Pre-existence, us being spirit children of God is not biblical. Crazy, right? That right there was actually the fact that broke the camel’s back, as they say. That is when I realized how badly this podcast really is needed. I never knew the complexities of this until after I had been out 20 years.

I never went through the temple. I was never married or went through an endowment ceremony. You all have enlightened me. I love that everything is so accessible now. You can read about the beliefs of the church on their website, black- and white. Everything in my head was kind-of fuzzy from my childhood. Doing a deep dive into Mormon doctrine and ceremony has been… interesting.

I needed it fresh so I could put myself in your shoes, back in my shoes 20 years ago and to clear the leftover teaching I still had in me.

5. What is theology, anyway?

And that opened up so many doors of needing to know more. It almost seems silly now, but there was a time, not that long ago when I had never even heard the word theology. Now, I want to be a theologian. It’s the study of God, by the way. Apologetics, seminary, all terminology I had no idea about from a Christian perspective and I love it! Doing this podcast, talking to you all has sent me on a deep dive and love for more about God, His word and building a relationship with Him through understanding Him more. So cool.

6. What makes a Christian?

Learning more about theology so I could share it also brought me to some places I did not expect. I learned that, unlike the LDS church where the beliefs are really my way or the highway, being a Christain is not like that. There are a ton of denominations, but even within the ‘non-denominational’, evangelical realm, there are all sorts of sub-beliefs. You can align with Calvinism, Arminianism, provisioning. Not everyone agrees. But the great thing is, almost everyone agrees that all that really doesn’t matter a ton. A big theologian I was listening to went into a great deal about all the ins and outs of deep stuff in Romans. So cool. At the end of it he said what I think is very reassuring about all of this- How much do you really need to know in order to be a Christain, very little. It really all comes down to grace.

7. You all are so brave?

I am a chicken. Did I mention the fear thing already? I have learned that you ladies are so brave. You all are so willing to share your stories. You are willing to stand up for your beliefs. you are willing to tell those you love and the world about your faith. Remember the first thing I said? I was afraid to even use the word Mormon on this podcast. I was also a big chicken about talking to my dad, still in the church about my faith. You all have made me stronger and I thank you all for it.

What changed with me being able to talk more freely on this podcast? I had to do what all of you have done, I had to talk to my dad. We are actually reading the New Testament together. Wish me luck and prayers.

8. Our God is so Big!

I have heard some hard stories on this journey. I have been confronted with true-believing Mormons confused about what I am doing. I have had theological discussions with my people that, well breaks my heart. I have been tempted to question and be so sad at times- How, God, can they ever be saved by You when they are so far from You? And then I am reminded of one of the biggest lessons there is- He will leave the 99 for the 1. Our God is so big. Nothing, not even a hardened heart or the most broken soul is too big for Him. He loves us and He comes for us. Sometimes we have to be broken in order to be found.

9. And when you are found, you know what you want.

A basic rundown on Christain beliefs.

I thought when I started this that I knew what you all wanted. I thought you would want something bigger. A huge lesson for me has been to truly listen. You want exactly what I wanted- to understand basic Christain beliefs. Just the real, for real basics. The trinity, eternal families, what the cross means, trusting the bible and what books are in it, the war in heaven and the fact that there was no pre-existence for us. I say basic, but all these things I know are big. I was expecting to get into the complexities of grace and salvation, atonement and being born again. But there is so much to all of this. So much that I can’t wait to continue to unpack with you all.

10. Trusting Him

I was a born entrepreneur. I love being creative and coming up with new ways to never let the grass grow beneath my feet. But over and over again in my life, the things I spent all my time on were a means to an end. Where was the meaning in the thing?

When God put this podcast out there for me to take on I admit I spent a lot of time acting like Jonah, willing to get swallowed by a huge fish rather than listen to God’s will. But I have had to trust. Trust that He knows better for me what hardship I can withstand and how important it is for the Kingdom that I am not afraid.

Truth is, I love this! As scary and humbling as this journey has been I cannot wait for each day to unfold. I had to trust Him when He said to talk to you all. It has been such a leap of faith and one that I plan to continue for a whole life long.

Where will the next 50 take us? what lessons are there to learn?


In the resource library, you will find a link to a ministry that offers courses to help you speak to those still in the church. Truth in Love Ministry Courses are going to feel a bit like review for some of you, but they will remind you how you once felt in the church and how to help those still there. Check it out in the link below.

Top Resources to help you Rock the Christian Life as an Exmo

I also want you to have all the best videos, articles, podcasts, communities- all sorts of cool things to help with moving forward.

The biggest thing- I want you to trust the bible and I know as an ex-Mormon this could be a struggle, so please head over and watch some of these cool videos on just how amazingly awesome and trustworthy the Bible really is.

I will continue to add to the library with things I find that will help you. Videos, articles, all the cool stuff to help you learn to pray, find truth and gain trust in the Lord.

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through Him, and without Him was not any thing made that was made. In Him was life, and the life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it….

…And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us…

John 1:1-14

Next Steps…

Find Community…

  1. Join the Christian Women After Religion Community

    Let’s share! Share your creative, God-led story, heal from the old religious junk and make friends while we do it. Support, friendship, and collaboration at the FB group — Here

With love, Shelby Hohsfield

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