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“So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. “

Corinthians 10:31

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How to Deal with the Feeling of Guilt and your New Found Freedom

Okay, let’s set the stage.

You’re out.

All those rules are now out the window. This also means you have to build a whole new friend group and Shila just asked if you wanted to go for girls’ night on the town.

Sure! But when all the girls start ordering margaritas and asking what you’re getting you freeze. Is this okay? What do my beliefs say about this? Screw the church for making me feel bad and awkward. Or is there a reason why this feels wrong?

And that brings us to what we are talking about today- 4 Steps to a Mindset Shift that Busts Guilt and Brings Grace.

Hold onto your Yeti, We are going to talk about what it means to be guilty, what it means to be transformed, what is grace, and why should not throw the baby out with the bathwater-

1) Throwing the Good out with the Bad

Have you ever heard that expression- It’s actually an idiom- don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater?

It’s silly, I know, but it refers to the concept of choosing to through all the good out with the bad.

Let’s get one thing straight. Man’s rules should never be our belief system, but that doesn’t mean we have to throw all the things that made us healthy, stronger, more vibrant people out with it.

I went through a lot of this really young. You could say I was a rebel, but I still remember the guilt. It all just somehow got so limped together- I didn’t believe so therefore I was going to go party it up like it was 1999- it actually was 1999.

This is no way to live a Christain life. This is no way to live any life.

Just because we are no longer subscribing to man-made rules masked as God’s rules cloaked in guilt, that does not mean we then become lawless disasters.

Mindshift move #1- We do not want to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Don’t get rid of the things that are good for you for the sake of breaking old rules that don’t matter.

But what then should we be following? What becomes our belief system to go by? For answers to that, we need to go to the one source that should always be our guide- His Word!

2) Is Guilt Real? Are YOU Guilty?

Yes ma’am! You are.

This is one of the first and probably the most major admissions that changes the mindset of true believers. You are a sinner. Me too. When Adam fell and original sin was introduced into the world we all took that. I know that directly contradicts- “We believe that men will be punished for their own sins, and not for Adam’s transgression.” the first article of faith. But as Christians, we follow the Bible and this is the gospel of the Bible.

Because of the fall of man, sin was introduced into the world, into our human DNA, and into our very being as sons of Adam. That is who we are born as. Our spirit is of Adam or this sinful world.

Which means we sin. And we sin some more. If you read the Bible you will see these are not stories of massive triumph in many cases. They are stories of what a sinful disaster even the most beloved people are.

So are we guilty? Yes. Everyday. God hates sin. And we are all guilty of it every day.

Mindshitft move #2- know you are sinful and guilty on your own. You ain’t perfect. Nobody, but God is.

This is a huge admission, and probably the most important. It leads to grace. Let’s keep going. I promise it gets better.

3) It’s not about YOU. Eek.

This is going to come off crass. First I tell you not to feel guilty, then I tell you are guilty, and now I tell you it’s not about you- the complete antithesis of modern self-help culture where it is all about you.

Well, the Bible, God, and the true message it brings is a very different story. In fact, it tells us something pretty big about this-

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Romans 12:2

I love this verse.

Okay, here it goes- the big one…

As a true Christian, there are no rules.

That’s right. There are zero rules.

I know you are like, but Shelby, that makes no sense because there are the 10 commandments and there are all the things Jesus said we need to do and not do and these sound like rules for Christians.

Nope.

Here it is. When you were born into this world you were born of Adam. You were born of this world. You were born a sinner. Have you ever watched a two-year-old for an afternoon? Sinners.

God knew this. He also knew that no amount of repenting or sacrifices under the old law would ever surface for our sin. It is too big. The only one who could do it was God.

Our grace, our forgiveness for all the mess we do is made perfect because of what He did on the cross.

Our acceptance of this transforms us- a renewal of our mind and soul.

There is nothing we could ever DO to earn it. We don’t deserve it, yet He gave it to us anyway- Grace.

It is not about what we do or don’t do. Our salvation is no way dependent on us drinking that margarita.

Mindshitft move #3- God’s grace is what saves us. It is not about you!

4) A Transformation to a Child of God.

And this is the beautiful part. When we recognize that we are sinners and God’s grace is our salvation, when we accept Him as our savior from our sinful ways, we are reborn!

We are truly transformed. We are made new!

We are no longer of Adam. We are reborn as God’s. We are adopted into His family.

We live with a totally different spirit. The flesh will always tempt us, but we now operate from a different place. As His, that peace and love is so full that it pours into all aspects of our lives. That is where the works come from. Not because our works save us, but because what we do is evidence of this transformation of our soul! We are dead before and now alive in Christ.

Mindshift move #4- Your works, what you do is not about following rules. What you do is your love letter to God.

So Should the Margarita Bring Guilt?

That is going to be between you and God.

What has he told you in His word?

The Bible is His way of speaking to you. There are so many passages about drunkenness, yet Jesus’ first miracle was turning water into wine. There really is so much and my personal opinion is this is going to be personal. After you spend time in His word where is He guiding you?

What it also says is that you and I have no right to judge each other. Your walk with God is your walk. What He guides you to and warns you against, your beliefs, will be determined by your time spent building that relationship with Him, prayer- you speak to Him, time in His word- He speaks to you.

But should you carry guilt about breaking old rules made up by men? No! They are sinners too.

But we can take these four mindshift moves to help us develop our own understanding of God’s will for our lives.

1. Mindshift move #1- We do not want to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Don’t get rid of the things that are good for you for the sake of breaking old rules that don’t matter.
2. Mindshitft move #2- know you are sinful and guilty on your own. You ain’t perfect. Nobody, but God is.
3. Mindshitft move #3- God’s grace is what saves us. It is not about you!
4. Mindshift move #4- Your works, what you do is not about following rules. What you do is your love letter to God.

WANT MORE DEEP DIVES INTO HIS WORD AND TIME WITH GAL PALS? Join my CHRISTIAN WOMEN AFTER RELIGION Insider’s Club right here!

That is His wisdom from above.

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